Silent Listening If something bad just happened to your friend, what would you do? Would you mention it to him and sayyou feel sorry about it? Would you offer support or advice? According to RuthClark, such treatment could mean well, but it might not bewhat he really wants or needs. Clark asked some collegestudents to imagine some unpleasant situations, e.g., a low examgrade or the dad’s loss of his job. The students were then asked how they would like to be treated bya friend who learned of the bad situation from someone else. The results were alittle surprising. Some said they would want andexpect their friend to mention the annoying situation, but most of thestudents in the study responded that they would like the friend not to do it. The students made the decision for themselves whether to discusstheir problem with a friend. So, there is value in being a silent listener around a troubled friend.
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